SIGNS OF EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE
Jul 27, 2017 By Damilola Ojo
Emotional intelligence is a different kind of intelligence that involves being able to identify emotions (in yourself and in others) to understand their effect and use that information to guide your feelings, thinking and behaviors. Emotional intelligence is a skill that is sharpened with practice; no one is born with the automatic tendency or ability to manage their emotions.
You think about feelings a lot, you're reflective and tend to question your feelings. You ask yourself questions like, "Why am I feeling this way?", "Does my feeling this way make sense?", "What caused me (or someone else) to say or do that?". You're mindful of your emotions and reactions; you get the answers to your questions and use the information to your advantage.
You Ask Others for Perspective
Emotionally intelligent people understand and appreciate the fact that others might not see things their way and might view these things from a completely different angle. They typically believe that it's not about right or wrong but about understanding how and why perceptions differ.
This might seem surprising but you'll marvel at how disrespectful an average person is in their interaction with others. This disrespect is not particularly because the individual is rude, but mainly because it doesn't occur to him/her that they're being rude in their actions. Emotionally intelligent people tend to recognize the power of common courtesy, expressions of appreciation and small words of exchange to strengthen relationships.
You Know When to Pause
You'll often find that emotionally intelligent people tend pause in the middle of a conversation or when asked a question to think before they speak. Theirs is a distinct pause that doesn't come off as nervous but contemplative. They understand and value the power of a pause and have learnt to use it efficiently before they act or speak.
You Explore the 'Why'
Emotional intelligent people tend to be quite investigative. They ask a lot of questions (which can sometimes be annoying) but they do so in bid to understand the reason behind behaviors and actions. They do this to develop qualities of empathy and compassion. They are typically very understanding people because of this trait, and can relate to almost anyone.
You Know Your Weaknesses
It takes a lot self-reflection, insight, courage and strength to be able to identify and admit weaknesses. Emotionally intelligent people have learnt to do this often and are well aware of their weakness. They do this because they know that the only way to overcome a weakness is to identify and admit it, before taking active steps to deal with it. After analyzing their weaknesses, they then develop strategies for encountering them in the future.
NOTE: Emotional intelligence is a skill you develop over time. No one is born with it. It is learned.
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