Each week Burrel Lee Wilks III writes a column in his free weekly newsletter--The Burrel Report--answering questions readers send in, and giving other readers a chance to share their point of view too. Over the next few weeks Burrel has agreed to share his advice with you. Keep an eye open for Burrel and his unique style of "life coaching without sugarcoating" and don't be afraid to weigh in on the discussion. Send your comments to advice@burrelstreetwise.com
Question of the week: "I 'stalk' my wife..."
Q: Derrick L. Mansfield asks: "Why don't I trust my wife? Every time she leaves home, I feel like I have to trail her. I've even skipped work a day or two so's I can keep an eye on here without her knowing. I know it's irrational but I just can't help myself. She thinks we have the perfect relationship..."
A: Burrel says: "First off, who are you fooling Derrick? She doesn't think you have the perfect relationship. Why do guys always underestimate their women. I don't know what triggered this insecurity you have, but I'll keep it real Derrick, you need some help man. Look at you, like a second rate CIA agent dogging her footsteps! If you can't get things under control, talk to her honestly about what's on your mind, and get back on track, then I suggest you get some professional help. If you don't Derrick you're firmly on a path towards emotional self-destruction."
A: Betsy K. Oklahoma says: "I had a wildly jealous husband and he made my life a misery. He followed me constantly, sat outside my workplace, called all my friends--even questioned my boss one day. It destroyed our relationship, and eventually destroyed him too. Today he's a shadow of the man I met, just holding it together. My advice Derrick is understand that this is your problem, not hers. Speak to someone you can trust. Tackle this now before it kills your marriage too."
A: Joe K. St Louis says: "Whoa man. Cool it. Rather than stalk your missus you should probably be stalking yourself--find out who the heck you are."
A: Phillip J. Missouri says: "I bet she did something pretty bad to trigger this Derrick. Can't imagine you just getting a bee under your bonnet otherwise. If she did cheat on you once, then I don't blame you for trying to catch her out a second time. Still you gotta ask is she worth it? The worry, the missing work, docked pay and all that. Could be time to move on bro."
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