For many of the 92 million adult singles in the U.S., the dawn of the New Year is accompanied by resolutions to get back into the dating game and find a mate. Yet according to Mary Vallone, President of Highlife Adventures, an upscale social club for singles in Chicago and Indianapolis, people are often jaded – if not downright cynical – about dating. "Everyone has horror stories about dates gone bad, but most negative experiences occur because people are looking for dates in the wrong places," she says. "With a bit of direction and a dose of common sense, having a rich and rewarding social life is almost guaranteed." Here are some tips for dating singles for the new year.
1. Indulge Your Passions
If you have a hobby or a pastime you enjoy, get together with others who share your interests. "You're much more likely to meet compatible people if you already have something in common," notes Vallone. "Not only will there be fewer uncomfortable silences, but your personality will shine when you share your enthusiasm and experiences."
2. Try Something New
If you're the type of person who is always up for an outdoor adventure, expand your horizons by joining a group to go kayaking, caving, or parasailing. "We schedule over 65 activities each month at Highlife Adventures, which allows our members to dip their toes in the waters of new experiences," says Vallone. "Those who enjoy culture can go to the symphony, while those who revel in the nightlife can opt for a moonlight party cruise."
3. The More, the Merrier
Whether your goal is to simply expand your social network or to meet Mr. or Ms. Right, traditional dating won't get you there. Instead, Vallone advises that you opt for group activities comprised solely of singles. "Today, people don't have the time for sequential one-on-one dating," she says. "Our recipe for success is to provide unique, fun events where singles can let their guard down and meet many people with whom they have something in common."
4. Ensure Your Safety
"Many singles have had perilous experiences on first dates," notes Vallone. "Unfortunately, you can't automatically trust people who you meet online, in a bar, or even through friends." This is one reason why Highlife Adventures prescreens potential members in person and ensures that a company representative attends each event. Vallone advises singles who are on their own to meet your date in a public place, to let a friend know where you'll be, and not to divulge too much personal information. "On a first date, the person you're out with is essentially a stranger," she says. "You need to be careful and always follow your instincts."
5. Put Down the Mouse
While online dating has its appeal, Vallone says that it's no substitute for personal interaction. "It's time to put down the mouse and get out of the house," she says emphatically. "If you've resolved to meet new people, you need to do it face-to-face."
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