It is a relationship wherein we enjoy each others company. We do things together like watching a basketball game or sometimes with the company of some friends. We are honest about our feelings with each other. There is mutual respect and sincerity between the two of us. It means we pay attention to each others opinion or thoughts. Always trying to reach out to each other to strengthen the bonds of the relationship.
On the other hand, to have an unhealthy or abusive relationship is to experience the exact opposite when we are having a healthy relationship.
We usually feel bad about ourselves. We do not verbalize our feelings. We take each other for granted. It could be in the form of hurting the other person verbally, abusing the person physically, emotional abuse and sexual abuse. Sometimes, both of them will be violent or be abusive to each other.
There are situations wherein only one is abusive to the other. Most often, the abusive relationship does not happen immediately only after sometime. That will be the manifestation of the real self of the person you promised to live with.
If we are experiencing an abusive relationship, then how are we to get out from such relationship?
First and foremost, we need to talk to somebody we could trust, like for example our parents, a friend , guardian, counselor, teacher or a doctor. We should relate to them that we are having an unhealthy relationship and what the other person did so as to abuse us.
If we are afraid to tell our parents, then we should approach somebody whom we trust to help us in telling our parents, to the counselor, security of the school, and even the police about the abuse. And we will be able to escape such relationship.
In leaving an abusive relationship, sometimes it is too risky to do so. There is a necessity for us to make a plan for our safety so that everything will be done smoothly. It will surely not be difficult and safer if we will have a plan. These are the tips for our safety plan.
• Do not be ashamed to tell your situation to somebody you trust.
• Mention directly to the person abusing you that you do not want to see him or her in order that they will not be able to touch you. Do it when your guardian or parents are present.
• If you are injured, go for treatment from your doctor or the hospital.
• Record in a diary when the date of abuse happened.
• Contact should be avoided with the person.
• Do not walk alone. Be with your friends.
• In case of emergency, look for a safer place like the police station.
• Always bring your cellphone, phone cards and money.
• In case the person is following you, do not hesitate to call 911.
• Always have the domestic violence hotline numbers.
Most of the times, it would happen that the various abuses we mentioned are done inside our very own home, we feel bad about this kind of situation. In other words, our home can no longer guarantee our safety and security with the other members of the family. Sexual abuse is committed right at the doorstep of our home. Child abuse is also done when a person assigned to take care of the child fails to do so.
There are times when the child is physically hurt out of jealousy. And what ever happens, the parents and health caregivers must be prepared to protect and take care of the child.