“My ex-husband cheated on me several times before we finally got divorced,” recalls Emma, 28. “I was so afraid to trust someone again.” Through online dating, she was able to get to know men at a much slower, more comfortable pace. “We’d exchange emails, call each other, until I was personally ready to meet them face to face,” she said. “I didn’t feel rushed to make a decision. I had full control every step of the way.” It took her 3 months before she agreed to have lunch with Steve. They’ve been together for 2 years, and they’re already talking about getting married.
Cecille, 25, had never been comfortable about the traditional dating scene. She’s always been shy, and the whole routine of hanging out in the bar and waiting for someone to buy her drinks was never her thing. “Besides, I’m the kind of girl that prefers reading a book in a quiet coffee shop,” she said. Online dating allowed her to meet people in a way that suited her personality—at her laptop, while sipping a cappuccino—and she worded her profile so she’d meet the guys who shared her love for reading. In fact, when she read Ben (her current boyfriend)’s email, the first thing that caught her attention was that they liked the same authors. “You don’t get that kind of ‘precision matchmaking’ in a bar,” she laughs.
Greg, 35, enjoys online dating because it puts him on a level playing field. “You really get to know people for who they are,” he said. He feels in traditional dating the first few dates focus too much on impressing each other, saying the right things, wearing the right clothes. But when you email and chat, what you pay attention to is the person’s attitude and personality. “You don’t have to wait until the fourth or fifth date to discover if you think alike,” he said.
On the other hand, Tori, 32, chose online dating because she wanted a little adventure in her life. “I live in a small town where you’ve known everyone since you were a little girl. It’s hard to meet anyone new, and if you go on a date, it’s big gossip the next day.” While she’s not ready for anything serious, she’s enjoying talking to different kinds of people from all around the world. “One of the men I really clicked with lives in Spain!” she said. “He’s so different from anyone I’ve ever known, but at the same time, he understands me more than even my family does!” She’s planning to take a month off from work to visit him.
