It is understandable that a person dealing with their partner’s marijuana addiction will feel frustrated, insecure and even angry at their partner’s unwillingness to change their ways. Unfortunately, these feelings often result in animosity and fighting rather than a solution of the problem. It takes a person of great character and patience to stay with an addict through their recovery – especially when they are not willing to admit they have a problem.
Many marijuana smokers still believe that pot is not an addictive substance. How can you convince a loved one to stop smoking marijuana when they don’t believe it’s doing them any harm? The very nature of this drug contributes to the problem; as your pot-smoking partner smokes more and more often, they tend to lose their perspective. They truly can’t see the damage they are doing to your relationship. They don’t understand the amount of time they spend smoking weed instead of doing the things you used to enjoy together. The amount of money they waste on marijuana just doesn’t seem like a big deal when they’re in their hazy, happy place.
Before approaching your loved one with your concerns, formulate a plan of action:
Educate – Have statistics to back up your claims. You can find great articles with marijuana addiction statistics in back issues of the CannabisAddicts.com website.
Articulate – For some of us, it’s just easier to say it in writing. If you have a hard time expressing the ways that your partner’s addiction affects you and your relationship together, write it down. You can either give them the list or refer to it as you speak to them about your concerns to be sure you stay on track.
Be Fair and Specific – They need to hear exactly what it is that their addiction is doing. Instead of general, negative comments such as, “You would rather smoke weed than hang out with me,” use positive phrases to explain to them HOW the addiction has changed your lives: “I miss the time that we used to spend together and I want us to have fun again, like we used to.”
Be Prepared for Resistance – The first time you broach the subject, you may not get the results you want. Understand that it may take several attempts to get your point across in a calm, rational manner. If you feel yourself becoming angry and frustrated with their seeming unwillingness to hear you out, walk away and try again later. Don’t lose your temper. This leads us to another important point…
Know Your Limits – Before approaching your partner about their marijuana addiction, you must know your own limits. If your intervention and support don’t make them quit, will you stay? Are you going to give them an ultimatum? Are you strong enough to walk away, or will you stay and put up with it if things don’t change? These are tough questions to answer, but you absolutely must know what YOU need from the relationship before you can explain that to your partner and expect them to follow suit.
If you are willing to put the effort into trying to help your partner stop smoking marijuana, I take my hat off to you. It is not an easy road and your patience will be tried over and over again. Be supportive, be strong, but don’t be afraid to take a break from it all if it all becomes too much for you.
