Studies at the University of Buffalo have shown that those who fall into addictions often suffer from a tendency for self-blame and shame and this may lead someone towards drugs and alcohol as a way to cope.
Look at your own tendences for shame if you are yourself inclined towards drugs and alcohol. Do you beat yourself up a lot after a specific situation? Or if you know someone with an inclination towards drugs or alcohol what is his or her self-esteem like?
In meditation classes it's often discussed that we are not our negative emotions, but can watch them. There is always a part of our mind that can observe our anger, jealousy, frustrations etc. Get in touch with that part rather than staying in the swirl that is a downward spiral of self-recrimination.
When there is a painful moment due to a bad situation at work etc, try and take a deep breath and remember that the boss or co-worker has their own set of issues etc. It is easy to go home and want some way to forget things and that is where alcohol and drugs can come in. But try to think about the person who insulte you . Are they really in control of their own emotions and their own reactions? Or are they just responding like a reflex perhaps based on their own family history and issues themselves?
The more we can see what other people are going through, the easier it is to not buy into their outbursts towards us and this can help stop the cycle that leads people into drugs and alcohol to soothe the pain. This helps us to be calmer and more peaceful and not part of the chain reaction.
