Of course, the men I am going to interview for the article wish to remain anonymous, so I will just call them Online Dater 1, 2, and 3.
We will begin with online dater 1; (a 37-year-old male)
Me: How did you hear about online dating?
Online Dater 1; How can you not hear about it. You get emails, popups at websites, etc. You’d have to live under a rock to have not heard about online dating.
Me: Where and how did you meet your first online date?
Online Dater 1; At Match.com. I was searching profiles and found a few women that I might be compatible with and sent them emails. I paid for a membership there so I would be allowed to email them.
Me: How long did you chat with this person online before you two decided to date in person?
Online Dater 1; We exchanged several emails before we actually exchanged phone numbers. And basically, one fairly long phone call turned into a date.
Me: What was it about them that made you want to meet them in person and did you feel they were your soul mate?
Online Dater 1; I thought she was sweet. She shared a lot of the same values I did, or said she did, anyway. She piqued my interest. I never thought of her as my soul mate, but did want to get to know her better.
Me: Was your first impression of her, upon seeing her in person a surprise, a positive reaction, or a negative reaction?
Online Dater 1; To be honest, she looked absolutely nothing like her picture. She had posted of picture of herself, much younger, and about 150 pounds lighter. However, she was still a very pretty lady.
Me: So, tell us what happened after meeting her in person.
Online Dater 1; We dated a couple of times. I did like her. I understand why she was still single at 38 years old. She wanted Antonio Banderas to wine and dine her and quite frankly neither of us was in that league. Her standards were far too high.
Okay, next I will be talking to a 29-year-old male about his experience.
Me: How did you hear about online dating?
Online Dater 2; Match.com emails.
Me: Where did you meet your first online date?
Online Dater 2; Same answer, emails from Match.com got me to sign up. I received an email from a girl who saw my profile.
Me: How long did you chat with this person online before you two decided to meet in person?
Online Dater 2; A couple of days. We talked by email for a couple of days, then by phone for a couple of days.
Me: What was it about them that made you want to meet them in person and did you feel they were your soul mate?
Online Dater 2; She was just really nice, sincere, honest sounding. She didn’t seem to just be saying what I wanted to hear. I felt her answers were honest. Everyone has their ups and downs in life and she was open about the things she was going through and things she had gone through. The openness impressed me. Did I think she was my soulmate? Honestly, yes.
Me: Was your first impression of her, upon seeing her in person a surprise, a positive reaction, or a negative reaction?
Online Dater 2; A positive reaction, totally. She matched her picture and profile to the letter and was smiling like an angel.
Me: So, tell us what happened after meeting her in person.
Online Dater 2; We dated frequently from day one. We were both obviously very interested in each other. In a very short time we both knew we were in love with each other. Within two months I knew she was the girl I wanted to marry. We’ve been happy ever since.
Last, a 38-year-old male shares his online dating experience with us.
Me: How did you hear about online dating?
Online Dater 3; A friend of mine suggested I try online dating. He had gone from never having a date to having a date every weekend, so I thought I would try it too.
Me: Where did you meet your first online date?
Online Dater 3; Yahoo Chat. I didn’t go directly to an online dating website, I put my free profile up in Yahoo Personals and someone contacted me through Yahoo Messenger.
Me: How long did you chat with this person online before you two decided to meet in person?
Online Dater 3; We only chatted for about an hour before deciding to meet in person. It was really quick. She suggested we meet in person. It was like 9pm at night and she suggested or hinted that something might actually, “happen” tonight. Since my friend had so much luck with online dating, I figured, what the heck.
Me: What was it about them that made you want to meet them in person and did you feel they were your soul mate?
Online Dater 3; That doesn’t really apply here as far as the whole soulmate thing. She lived close by and well, I am a guy.
Me: Was your first impression of her, upon seeing her in person a surprise, a positive reaction, or a negative reaction?
Online Dater 3; None of those. She was alright, kind of plain, but still attractive. She didn’t really have much personality and I don’t think either of us were looking for personality that night.
Me: So, tell us what happened after meeting her in person.
Online Dater 3; This is where it gets ugly. We had fun the first evening. A couple of days later I invited her to my house. And again, it was okay, but I realized that this was not the girl for me. So, I politely told her that I really did not want to continue seeing her.
Four days later, on a non-exciting Sunday Night, I climbed into the shower before going to bed. About 15 minutes into my shower, this girl, unannounced, appeared IN my shower professing her undying love. My front doors were LOCKED, she broke into my house, stripped down, and climbed into my shower.
I started having visions of the movie, Fatal Attraction. I asked her to leave. She said no. I had to actually have the police remove her!
Me: Does this mean you won’t be dating anyone from online ever again?
Online Dater 3; No, not at all, however, the chatroom hookups are out of the question. I would prefer to go with a legitimate company that has some sort of screening process.
Okay, I would sum up my various interviews like this. You will meet some people you like and some you don’t. There will be successful online dating experiences and there will be failures. But not to try online dating at all is to have already failed. Just as online dater 3 said though, go to a legitimate online dating service and not just to some chatroom.
