What do guys usually want to know about their online brides? These are the most important questions asked by men from our online brides. Tips of what to ask and what not to ask your online bride while corresponding with her.
This article was prepared based on the men's letters to our Russian brides. We decided to show you which are the most common questions you ask the ladies, and to tell you what questions are absolutely inappropriate to ask and what questions the ladies answer with please. Learn on other’s mistakes and avoid repeating them, some of these inappropriate questions turned women off and man left questioning himself what could happen and why his woman doesn’t respond.
1) How many men are you corresponding with?
When people after few frustrating tries to be happy in love relationships decide to start searching in the Internet, it means that they don’t want to have negative experiences any more. Basicly they want to secure themselves, because it’s very difficult to make a right choice just according to the guy’s or girl’s profile, unless you naturally have a great intuition. So, this becomes a good reason why men and women are corresponding with several people at once. This is a common and good start for the “second half” searches in the Internet. At first you start communicating with several Russian brides that you’ve chosen and you think they suit you most of all, then after a couple of letters you get a better idea of their personalities and again you select for yourself. The same thing happens to the ladies. They also can write to several guys and they also have a right to choose, though they are more sensible and can make their decision to continue corresponding with some guy even after the first letter. It means that the ladies have a less number of online partners than men. That’s why it is so important to ask the girl right questions and not to offend her. And it's worth mentioning, that since women originally are monogamous, after starting their husband search from the communication with the several guys, they prefer to choose a right one and tend to continue their correspondence with only one man in order to get to know him as good as possible.
2) Do you agree to marry me? (this question is considered to be inappropriate at the early stage of communication).
Asking this question at the early stage of your virtual relationship is really inappropriate. When you both make first attempts to become closer with each other through the correspondence, you try to understand one another better, to imagine how you usually try to live your day and other more serious topics. Many people cannot answer this question even after having some relationships for several months. Although, it happens that things may go that smooth that girls could make their decision regarding marriage right after starting correspondence, though that's very seldom. Of course, she must know which guy from the whole bunch she is attracted to most of all. However, the guys that already have their Russian wives and those who have an experience of communication with the Russian bride say and strongly recommend the others to come to the girlfriend’s country after 3 months of correspondence. Otherwise, it will make difficult to continue already established positive relationship and keep them warm for a long time. Actually, guys can feel from the letters when the relationship is quite strong and enough serious and when the girl is ready to meet him and when they both are ready to do the next step.
3) Do you speak English well?
Most of the women in CIS do not know English. However, due to the demand of the modern time the percentage of girls who speak English language increases. A lot of international companies that appeared on CIS market during the recent years demand the knowledge of English from their employees, when in the past decades, there was almost no need in knowing English for local people.
After few years of USSR collapse, the English language meant a higher salary and better work conditions for those who have learnt it. Some time after, people started understanding what privileges this opportunity can give... and they started studying English. In that time it was very popular to learn English, and everybody tried to study it, though not so many of them continued and obtained good results.
Now people are more concerned about their English skills, since now locals have more opportunities to have fellowship with the native speakers. But the problem is that many persons don’t have a chance to afford their English classes since comparatively this service can be quite expensive for the local people. Many young ladies start studying English language on their own. They usually use special self-teaching computer disks or buy specialized literature. But as a rule they stop doing it when start having more difficult tasks. Many of them know some English words, but can’t speak fluently and build sentences. And of course, without actually practising it, their language barrier is tremendous. Especially, if to take into consideration that they have no idea about the difference in English that is spoken by Russian-speaking people (Soviet English, if it can be called so) and by native speakers.
4) Are your letters translated or do you read and write in English?
Some of the girls registered in “Oksanalove” know a little English, but they are afraid to say even one word in English because of the high language barrier. That’s why their letters are translated, they cannot write letters themselves. Sometimes, the girls try to write to their men in the agency just to see how good they are in expressing their thoughts. Gradually, step-by-step after having intensive English language course in the agency (that is usually arranged for them by their online boyfriends) girls can write some short and simple messages to their fiances or even try to speak with the beloved ones on phone without the help of an interpreter. The guys are usually so happy to receive the messages written by their brides that it’s just lies beyond the words :)! For the ladies that do know English on a basic or fluent level and try to write some letters in English themselves, they still ask our interpreters to check their grammar and correct it if there are some mistakes
5) If you come to my country would you like to work in your professional sphere? This is a good question.
Most of Russian brides are very intelligent and well-educated, though they remain to be just good wives and mothers at home and just have some low-paid job that allows them to make their living somehow. They want to grow professionally and get to know many new things by doing something that they were studying to do. They would probably like to get a certificate on their professional activity in the country of her husband, but, of course, all this will take some time, before a girl can read and speak fluent language.
6) How safe is your country would be for me, if I decide to visit you?
Well, let me ask you first, how safe are some parts of LA, or New York? Do you know any country that is 100% safe and doesn’t have any crimes happening in? That’s right there is no such place in the world. Talking about most former USSR countries – these places are absolutely safe destination for tourists. These countries historically are a very hospitable and once you are there, you will love it. The only thing that can cause difficulties for a foreign man coming to this country – is that many people here don’t speak English and it’s difficult to deal with them. The only concern for a foreigner about being there may be that it’s better to have someone who can meet you at your arrival and who can help you to decide all the bureaucratic stuff regarding documents and your stay. But it’s better to ask to assist you with this some persons that you know and someone you can be in liaise with before your leaving, to make sure that everything will be ready to the date of your arrival. Actually, arranging the stay in the FSU countries through the agency you are registered in is the safest and cheapest option. And if you try to manage to do all this on your own when you are already there, it will cost you a lot of time, money and your nerves. It’s true that people love bribes there, and any instance you will address to on your own will try to charge you more than the original price is. It will happen after they figure out that you are a foreigner.
7) Do you believe in love from the first sight, or love in the internet?
Everybody who address to a dating agency probably believes that love happens even in the internet, no matter if it’s love from the first sight or love that will come later in serious communication. Many couples that already found one another are very happy and are really in love. Otherwise, they would not probably spend their time and so much affords for searches of a beloved one in a different part of the world and they would not refuse from being in serious relationship with the opposite sex in their home-country. The bottom line is - those who want to know the answer on this question have probably try to answer it, as if they were asked to answer this question, so than they could figure out what’s true and false.
8) Your relationship to kids? Would you like to have kids with me?
Every Russian bride who comes to the agency to find a lifetime partner for herself has a greatest desire to create a family and to have kids. All the women just have a common wish to give all the best for their children and they all want a bright future for their kids. The adult generations in Russia had to face difficult transition period of the country after the collapse of the USSR. Even though a lot of things have been changed since then, there are still many difficulties for people living here. And the younger generations that still remember that tough time and they still have to face its consequences now, don't really want their children to grow in the difficult conditions. Women in CIS in general are very family-oriented and were raised and taught to be considerate and understanding wives to their husbands, and loving and caring mothers to their children. In most part Russian women are making excellent mothers, for men who have children already and need a good mother and good example for them – Russian bride is the answer.
9) What’s your typical day?
The typical day of any Russian bride is quite intensive. It starts early in the morning and lasts till late night. She’s got to sort many things during her working day. And even on the week-ends she’s got to do house work.
Actually, Russian women do all the housing stuff by themselves. After their working day they have to cook, clean their place and do shopping. All what they do is they try to comfort their family and do everything possible to make all of their relatives, parents, kids happy and keep them warm. A guy who came to Almaty to marry his online bride was surprised when he saw how many things his beloved woman has to sort during the day and at the same time she stays so well-groomed, elegant and beautiful. He even said that any American woman would die after one year of living in CIS.
10) What would your family react if you decide to move to a different country far away from them?
Before girls decide to start their searches in the Internet, they probably agree on this with their parents and ask their advices and permission. When we talk about the Russian brides, we have to take into consideration that they have such a mentality of respect to their older relatives. It means that if they made a decision to go to the marriage agency, they must be sorted everything with their parents.If we are talking about all the FSU women in general, most of them will keep very close relationships with their parents, they probably will discuss the possibility of this type of search with them. Most parents agree with their daughter decision as any parent wants to see their kids happy – no matter where the happiness awaits for them.
11) What have you never had in a relationship that you dream of?
Every woman dreams of being gently treated, respected and the most important thing is that every girl just wants to be understood by her man. Since males and females do percept things differently due to their way of logics distinction, both sexes see things in different ways. Everybody knows about that, but still people tend to apply their world perception to the others and this may be the first reason of conflicts and misunderstanding appearance in relationships between men and women. However, females are more patient, and even though they are more sensitive and emotional they always try to understand their men if they feel sincerity and openheartedness from the other side. The thing is that due to their inborn maternal instinct, woman always tries to help, to protect, understand, comfort and sacrifice for a person that is close to her. But at the same time woman wants her man to appreciate all her care for him and have some kind of reward for that. Woman always wants to have harmony in relationship and she always wants her man to be patient and understanding with her. Probably this is the thing that woman dreams of in relationship with her man.
12) Are you all about money or are you just seeking your way out of your country?
This kind of question is absolutely unacceptable. First of all, even because of if you ask such kind of question, you will never get the answer on it. And secondly, you have poor chances to meet your special lady if you start your correspondence with such things. Because only a few of the girls will agree to continue a correspondence with a man who asks such kind of questions. It’s absolutely inappropriate to ask this question if you seek for a serious relationship. So, better change your attitude and try to think positively
13) Why she doesn’t feel comfortable if I hold her hand or try to kiss her in a public place?
Some guys sometimes are wondered why their Russian brides are so tender and passionate when they are together just on their own and but feel uncomfortable and embarrassed when the guys kiss and embrace them in public. Well, the guys have to bear in mind that the girls that have been raised in the eastern culture (especially the ones with the oriental background) have been taught not to show their feelings to the opposite sex when they are in some public place since it is considered to be as disrespect to the others and especially if there are some elder people are hanging around. The thing is that Asians have some sort of conservative mentality, though with time they are able to adjust to the culture of their fiance that is new for them and gradually they become more liberated.
14) Are you more career or family-oriented?
The Russian women are strongly home and family oriented. So, the family is the biggest value for them in life, though they got used to combine their personal life with work and they manage well with everything. Probably it would be easier for her to socialize and make her life with her husband in a different country more interesting if she works and has some time to be on her own and have some personal interests.
15) What does Christmas mean to you?
The Christian population of the FSU countries does not celebrate Christmas on December 25th, since according to the Orthodox calendar the Christmas is celebrated on January 7th. And most of the girls know about the tradition to celebrate Christmas on December 25th only from the movies. Anyway, all the girls here love the holidays, so they will be happy to celebrate another bright, joyful and magic holiday with their family.
16) What qualities do you appreciate in men?
Any woman definitely wants to see a sincere, honest, faithful, caring and understanding man beside herself. The one who is a gentle lover, best friend and a good father for his kids. A person who can “try her boots on” sometimes, and who is able to protect her and be on her side in any situation. If she feels that her man has these qualities, she could reward him for everything he does for her and make him to be the happiest man in the world
