Writing a good online Dating Profile takes a little time and effort and done properly can bring a continuous stream of potential quality dates. It is important to pay attention to the details when writing your profile and avoid the following 4 pitfalls at all costs, as these can often make the difference to your dating experience and to the quality of responses you get.
1. The Copycat Pitfall.
I'm sure that you will agree when I say that this is one of the most common pitfalls that hundreds have fallen into. How many hundreds of profiles sound the same? Some are almost identical. Why? Could it be because people don't know what to say? Or could it be that some dating sites who give profile writing advice tell their members to look at other profiles before they write their own? Has this unintentionally resulted in the copycat effect? Who knows?
Whatever the reason, it is important for you to be as unique as you can. There is only one you. No two people are the same, which means your personal ads shouldn't be the same either. You should avoid being stereotyped at all costs. This way, you make a unique claim on your ad. And you make your individuality a lot more visible.
2. The Personal Adjective Pitfall.
Some people in order to describe themselves use the same old personal adjectives that don't really say anything; you know the same old generic stuff that could apply to half the population: "I am an honest, creative, funny person"
When describing yourself, where possible show your unique qualities by emphasizing them in the way you write your ad. For example, instead of writing: "I am a funny witty person." Write your ad using your own humorous style.
People are funny in different ways; you need to decide how to show your sense of humor in a way that is your own. You must differentiate yourself from the others.
If you are a person that is able to make witty comments about themselves, go for it - it always acts as a turn on. You know the best part about humor. It always works. It sells like a billion dollars.
If you are a creative person then write creatively and the reader will see your creativity. Don't write "I am intelligent" Just write your ad correctly, make sure it reads well, and it has no grammatical errors. Don't tell them. Show them. Listen, I"m not telling you never to use personal adjectives in your profile, I"m just saying use them wisely and sparingly. Use action words where applicable.
The other point I want to make is using nothing but "I's" in your profile: writing too many "I like", " I am", "I want" and "I don'ts" may portray you as a selfish person, someone who only focuses on themselves; this is not attractive and certainly not good selling point.
Remember the reader is not just interested in you. They want to know why they should contact you. Give them a reason. Don't just talk about yourself, involve them.
3. The Negativity Pitfall.
Take a look at the following sentences and see which one is more attractive and appealing to you:
"I've been dreading this for ages. To tell the truth, I am fed up with people and dating sites. " Or "I've found out that there are some awesome people online, and I'm really excited to meet them."
The first one is written by someone who obviously has a negative attitude! Would you want to date this person? Negativity is a major turn-off. Avoid anything negative. People don't respond well to negativity.
Don't include anything negative in your profile, even though at times it seems easier to think about what you don't want or don't like. Just rephrase it to into a positive. Transform your weaknesses into fine points. Or better yet, make your weak points very subtle. Focus more on your finer qualities.
So instead of using phrases like: "I'm mostly a loner, with only a few friends and I absolutely hate the noisy overcrowded bar scene" Say "I'm a true individual with unique genuine qualities, whose social interests vary from gathering intimately with a small group of friends to quiet nights in with my favorite author"
The idea is to take your fearful negative thoughts and change them into optimistic and positive ones. Be upbeat, positive and have fun writing your profile, others are much more likely to have fun reading it.
4. The Writing For Everyone Pitfall.
One misconception about writing a personal ad is that you should write for an audience. This is silly, I mean ask yourself: Do I really want to date the audience? If you do, go for it. But most likely, you just want to meet the 'one'. You know, your ideal partner.
You need to write like you are talking to the one person you want to meet. Make it personal to them. Write in such a way that makes them feel that you are really talking to him/her. Remember that you are NOT looking to achieve hundreds of responses; you are looking to get quality responses from those that you are interested in and would be attracted to.
You will want to write your profile differently depending on whether you're looking for a casual or serious relationship. Obviously, in a casual relationship you're just looking for some fun. Go ahead, there's nothing wrong with that, as long as your profile makes it clear where you're coming from. You don't want to mislead people.
There could be trouble when one person is in for something more serious and the other is into sheer hedonism and fun! So you should absolutely make your intentions clear from the start. Doing this automatically weeds out those that don't fit the bill for you, therefore saving you hours of time which enables you to focus your efforts on those that do interest you.
Your dating success can be achieved by paying attention to the details. This can make all the difference. Good Luck and have fun!
