How to Overcome that Bondage of Shyness and Gain Courage

Aug 28, 2019 Kayode Oseh

Shyness is an emotion that affects how a person feels and behaves around others or towards situations. It can make one feel uncomfortable, self-conscious, nervous, timid, and insecure. It can be accompanied by some physical sensations which includes blushing, speechless, shaky or fidgeting and breathless. It is a disorder that many people face and it usually take a big toll on their lives and everyday activities. When you are not at ease with yourself when around others, it signifies shyness.

Shyness makes one feel unsure of himself and can make him or her hesitate in saying something or doing something. What normally triggers shyness in people is when they don't know how to act in situations or when faced with new situations, when meeting new people or speaking in front of a group for the first time. Like other emotions, shy feelings can be mild, medium, or intense — depending on the situation and the person involved.

People who are shy may need more time to get used to change. They might prefer to stick with what's familiar compare to an unfamiliar situations or people. Shy fellows often hesitate before trying something new. They are not too quick to participate in group activity. They usually take longer to warm up before getting ready to meet with new people and facing new challengaes.

Why Are Some People Shy?

Shyness is not completely as a result of genes a person has inherited, it is also influenced by behaviors they've learned from their environment, the ways people have reacted to their shyness, and life experiences they've had.


All characteristics and behaviors are controlled by our DNA. A lot of people have a genetic tendency to be naturally shy. But not everyone with this tendency develops a shy attitude. It has been shown that Life experiences can also have a bigger role to play.

Life experiences.

How people approached a particular situation that may lead them to feel shy would also determine how they would react when faced with similar situation in the future. For example, if you are a shy person and you approach new things little by little, it can help you become more confident and comfortable. But if you feel pushed into situations you didn't prepare for, or if you feel teased or bullied, it can make you even more shy.

Does Shyness have any Advantage?

Shyness may have some little advantage.

Many shy people have gift that even they themselves may not be aware of or may not appreciate. Since they are the type of people that don't talk much, they are usually good listeners and that is one of the best characteristics of a good friend. Many people would prefer to go close to someone that can pay attention to what they have to say, people they can share their feelings with. And shy people are usually the type of people that have this great characteristics, they have high level of empathy and are sensitive to other peoples feeling and emotions. This made many people to often consider them the finest friends.

When is Shyness Extreme?

Shyness becomes extreme when one develops an anxiety disorder called social phobia an extremely powerful fear that keep one away from social activities. This can cause a person to avoid social situations and hold back on trying new things or making new friends. And it can prevent someone from taking advantage of opportunities or trying new things.

How can Shyness be Overcome or Managed

If you must cope with shyness or overcome it you must learn to understand the following;

Overcoming shyness takes practice. The more you practice social behaviors, the easier they get, and the more natural they feel for you.

Take slow, steady steps forward. Don't think you can overcome it all of a sudden, this is where most people get it wrong. If you don't want to be discouraged anytime soon, learn to take things slowly, and do not be too hard on yourself when you see that things are not improving yet.

It's OK to feel awkward. Everyone does sometimes. People who are shy are often afraid to feel awkward or uncomfortable. But don't let that keep you from doing what you want.

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